This white elephant season, we’ve designed three cardboard boxes that appear to contain luxury appliances from Cremsiffino*, a non-existent Italian brand that we totally made up. But much like an empanada, it’s what’s on the inside that really matters.

Inside there’s a Smirnoff ICE just waiting to amaze your friends, dazzle your second favorite coworker, or baffle your extended family! With Smirnoff ICE Boxes, we’re bringing the element of surprise back to the holidays. You can thank us later. Or now. That’s fine too.

*Cremsiffino is an Italian-sounding anagram for Smirnoff ICE. Didn’t get it when you looked at the box? Great. That’s kinda the point.